First comes love, then comes marriage… and then there’s that darn reception. Where you suffer through a slideshow that shows you in your pre-Loli days. Where your drunk uncle falls over while dancing the Y.M.C.A. But if La Carmina were planning your banquet, it might look something like this:
These snapshots are from shock-rocker Marilyn Manson’s 2005 wedding to burlesque artist Dita von Teese. Most of us can’t afford custom-made Wedgwood porcelain flowers, let alone count Ozzy Osbourne and David Lynch among our guests. We can, however, be inspired by the couple’s phantasmagoric vision:
“In the double-height Great Hall [of the Irish castle], a baronial table covered with Swarovski ruby-colored crystals bears some of the 4,000 black and crimson roses [...] arranged in great volcanic eruptions. Black and gold skull-shaped candles gutter, and a roaring log fire crackles in the hearth. In the dining room, the newly-weds will sit together between two long banqueting tables, lit by the candlelight from towering candelabras spilling with the garnet fronds of love-lies-bleeding, roses, and clusters of dark-burgundy grapes. [...] The napkins are monogrammed black on black with the couple's elaborate Victorian initials. This motif also decorates the Wedgwood side plates and is woven into the black lace curtains that hang at the high windows.” + Vogue Magazine, March 2006
You too can hold your wedding reception under the Gothic arches of a castle. A similar atmosphere can be achieved on a budget; candles and grapes are inexpensive, and dried red roses make for a striking centerpiece.
As for music, take a cue from Manson and von Teese, who hired German warbler Max Raabe and his 12-piece orchestra to perform 1930s classics such as “Cheek to Cheek.” Quite the refreshing alternative to a Mike Myers-esque wedding singer!
The couple splurged on Angus beef, lobster, and prawns – but I’d treat my guests to eerie-yet-cute finger foods. Above are dessert examples from the Gothic & Lolita Bible. Anything involving dark chocolate, raspberries, strawberries, and vanilla icing is certain to please.
Last but not least, there’s the wedding cake. How about a dark chocolate layer cake with black and red icing roses… shaped like a coffin?
Many girls dream of getting married on a tropical beach in a strapless Vera Wang and diamonds… but to a Gothic Lolita, that actually sounds more like a nightmare! For her, nothing less than a frou-frou horrorshow will do. Here’s how La Carmina would plan a Gothic Lolita wedding. (The next post will cover the reception and food.)
The bride’s dress: My Gothic Lolita outfits tend to be subdued - such as in the Thanksgiving photos - but on my big day, I’d go all out. Go ahead; drown me in layers of black/white ruffles and bows. Petticoats? Boned corsets? Panniers? Bring ‘em on.
Many Japanese Lolita brands sell fanciful dresses that can double as wedding gowns. You might find something like this white Heart E dress from Baby, the Stars Shine Bright, or Metamorphose Temps de Fille. Accessorize sumptuously with Victorian chokers and brooches, lacy gloves, and chunky Mary Janes or boots.
Makeup and hair: Unlike her pasty Goth cousin, a Gothic Lolita’s makeup leans towards the natural. Try highlighting your eyes with subtle fake lashes and black, grey, or brown eyeshadow. Lips can be lightly tinted brownish-pink or blood red. As for your hair, think Rococo: partial or side up-dos, straightened doll bangs, long ringlets, flower ornaments. I’m a fan of little hats or headbands with veils, such as in the photos above.
The groom’s suit: Your special guy will look real Dandy in a frock coat or tail coat and Victorian-style trousers. I love military accents and punk-inspired chains, as well as vests under cutaway jackets. A ruffled shirt, or jabot and cuffs, adds a Romantic touch – and a top hat is absolutely necessary. Wait. You say he’s reluctant to dress Kodona? Are you really sure you want to marry him? Bridesmaids: Your bridesmaids may not be as devoted to Lolita fashion as you are (I can picture them squirming under a bonnet like Ichigo in Kamikaze Girls). The photo above shows a nice compromise. You can put your maidens in black dresses and boots, and then Loli-fy them with matching fishnets, mini-hats, and hair flowers.
The setting: A Gothic church or Victorian-era home is an ideal spot for walking down the aisle. Look for rooms with dark wood detailing, rich carpets and drapes, and maybe a dramatic stone or carved fireplace. Decor ideas include red roses, long candles, red and black grapes, and sheer swatches of dark fabric.
After the ceremony, you and your hubby can head to the nearest graveyard to scowl for photos. Ah! Doesn't it sound lovely?
Introducing our baby: Basil the Scottish Fold! Ronan raised him from kittenhood - and after I rubbed his round head and foldy ears, I couldn't leave without him (Bazzie, that is). This delicate soul now lives in my loft and Ronan has visitation rights. He fits in with my Goth Loli aesthetic, wouldn't you say?
In fact, Gothic Lolita fashion is pussy galore. HellCatPunks' logo is a menacing feline skull with an ear stud and choker. Cat ear headbands, hoodies, and hats are popular (a Lolita Kisama version is pictured). Kitties are often found in prints and graphics, such as on this Putumayo top.
One of the most cat-happy Lolita designers is h.NAOTO. Every season, he releases a full line of juniors clothing, toys, and accessories featuring the undead kitties Hangry and Angry. Naoto also styled Hello Kitty for a collection of cell phone charms (as seen above), which you can purchase from
Strapya World.
Felines are a recurring motif because of their Gothic associations. Anyone who's watched Sabrina the Teenage Witch knows that scowling, hair-raised black cats are linked to witchcraft. In the Dark Ages, cats were feared as imps given from Satan to his followers. Witches supposedly took the form of their "familiars" to travel unnoticed. Many people still shudder when a black cat crosses their path, believing it to be bad luck.
But we musn't forget that pussies have a Loli side. They are adorable, loving, gentle... everything that a Sweet Lolita strives to be. Sanrio's Hello Kitty, Chammy Kitty, and Chococat prove that in Japan, the pointy-eared animal is the definition of totemo kawaii (uber-cute).
Fuzzy Basil is both Gothic and Lolita. Trust me, your heart melts when he raises a fat paw and mews and curls up beside your pillow. But he's also a creature of the night, with a flat owl-face and glow-in-the-dark eyes. No wonder we had to steal him. Totemo kawaii ne???
Ronan and I stole Basil! Our baby will live in my loft and Ronan will have visitation rights. Roasty toasty by the fire. Victorian ladies would stick dead birds on their hats. The dove eyes me warily...
Whenever I try on tiny Japanese clothes, I'm convinced that only a doll could fit in them. Well, now that’s literally the case. Early next year, Pullip is releasing three figures dressed à la Gothic Lolita by designer h.NAOTO.
Pullip dolls hit Japan in 2003 and quickly became trendy collectables. The dolls are twelve inches tall; each has an oversized head and anime eyes that can be manipulated with a lever. New styles are released monthly, along with the occasional limited-edition. I’m not fond of dolls, but I do appreciate the Gothic, Sweet, and Punk Lolita clothes that many Pullips sport.
Soon available for pre-order ($98 each) is the spawn of Pullip and designer Hirooka Naoto. The details of the clothes and accessories are jaw-dropping – dig those studded leather chokers! Fortunately for me, h.NAOTO is also releasing human-sized versions of these outfits. From left to right, the dolls are:
+ Pullip Prunella, in a layered Goth Loli dress from the Frill collection. She sports a lacy white hat and holds a tote bag stamped with the brand logo. [Pre-order in Jan 08; ships in Feb 08]
+ Taeyang Horison (Pullip’s boyfriend), in punk gear from h.ANARCHY. The website asks: “Why don’t you ask your boy friend to dress matching with TAEYANG HORISON?” Somehow, I don’t think that’d go over so well. [Pre-order in Feb 08; ships on Mar 30]
You can view more styles and order Pullips from Valley of the Dolls. My LA buddies can poke their heads into the flagship US store at 8230 Beverly Blvd, Suite 1.
KissCurl is: a) a lock of hair curled into a spiral and plastered on the forehead; b) a UK-based mad hatter that makes lovely handmade Gothic Lolita headgear. The art of millinery has decayed with the advent of baseball caps (rest in peace, dear Queen Mother)! It's up to Goth Lolis to keep the look alive. And KissCurl steps up to the task with finely-made hats and hair accessories that draw upon Victorian, Belle Epoque, Art Deco, and 1940-50s glamour. The items above, which range from $30-80, would complement any head-to-toe black Lolita outfit (also known as kurololi).
KissCurl's storefront is on Esty.com, a site that is akin to a global craft fair. Take a few minutes to search for "Gothic Lolita." You'll find 20+ pages of rings, hats, lace headbands, chokers... all of which are unique, handmade, and generally better priced than similar goods on eBay.
Many girls dream of getting married on a tropical beach in a strapless Vera Wang and diamonds… but to a Gothic Lolita, that actually sounds more like a nightmare! For her, nothing less than a frou-frou horrorshow will do. Here’s how 
Makeup and hair: Unlike her pasty Goth cousin, a Gothic Lolita’s makeup leans towards the natural. Try highlighting your eyes with subtle fake lashes and black, grey, or brown eyeshadow. Lips can be lightly tinted brownish-pink or blood red. As for your hair, think Rococo: partial or side up-dos, straightened doll bangs, long ringlets, flower ornaments. I’m a fan of little hats or headbands with veils, such as in the photos above. 
